Early Entrance

Monday, December 25, 2006

There has been something on my heart since leaving the convent. I have tried to put it in the back of my mind but it will not go away. It is not a nagging thought, just a reoccuring one. It is of early entrance. I feel very calm when I think of entering as early as this coming September. In fact, I would be very happy if that were to happen. I haven't said anything about my feelings in this regard but it continues to come up.

I was having dinner recently with a friend who said that ultimately, I must listen to God. If I think God is calling me to enter in September, I should not ignore it. Vocation Directors are there to give advice and counsel and to aide a discerner in discernment. But it is a mutual process. I must be open about what I feel and am feeling called to do just as much as he or she is being open about what they feel.

I'll have another meeting soon with my spiritual director and I will tell him about it then. I really am looking for feedback on this, as I do not know what to tell Sister the next time I speak with her.

I still have not spoken to sister about what she or the community thought about my belonging there. She of course invited me to come back, but I'm sure they invite everyone back. They won't shut their doors to anyone so quickly, will they? I don't think so.

I'm a little anxious to talk with my spiritual director about all that is on my heart in my discernment. It's been way too long...


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